Happy February 35th!

"Thirty days hath September, all the rest I can't remember" says the jokester about the rhyme to remember how many days each month has. They tried to teach us the rhyme "thirty days hath September, April, June and November" in grade school. I prefer the knuckle method where you start on your index finger's knuckle as Jan with 31 days then the first 'valley' is February with 28 or 29, then the next knuckle is March with 31 (see a pattern developing here?) So all knuckles are 31 days and all valleys are 30 days except that pesky February. When you get to your Pinky knuckle for July you don't turn around, rather you jump back to the index knuckle for August which has 31 days also. What? How come 2 months in a row have 31 days you ask? Well accounts differ but I'll give you my take on the whys and wherefores.

• January: 31 days. Most likely named after Janus, Roman god of doors, beginnings, sunset and sunrise, had one face looking forward and one backward.
• February: 28 or 29 days. On February 15 the Romans celebrated the festival of forgiveness for sins; (februare, Latin to purify).
• March: 31 days. Named after Mars, the Roman god of war, the original first month in the Roman calendar. It was the first month of warfare because no one fought in the winter.
• April: 30 days. From the Roman month Aprilis, perhaps derived from aperire, (Latin to open, as in opening buds and blossoms) or perhaps from Aphrodite, original Greek name of Venus.
• May: 31 days. Pehaps named after Maia, Roman goddess, mother of Mercury by Jupiter and daughter of Atlas.
• June: 30 days. Named after Juno, chief Roman goddess of email.
• July: 31 days. Renamed for Julius Caesar in 44 BC, who was born this month; Quintilis, Latin for fifth month, was the former name (the Roman year began in March rather than January).
• August: 31 days! Formerly Sextilis (sixth month in the Roman calendar); re-named in 8 BC for Augustus Caesar. Both July and August were named after Caesars so one could not have more days than the other, hence two 31 day months in a row.
• September: 30 days hath. September, (septem, Latin for 7) the seventh month in the Julian or Roman calendar, established in the reign of Julius Caesar.
• October: 31 days. Eighth month (octo, Latin for 8) in the Julian (Roman) calendar. The Gregorian calendar instituted by Pope Gregory XIII established January as the first month of the year.
• November: 30 days. Ninth Roman month (novem, Latin for 9). Catholic countries adopted the Gregorian calendar in 1582, skipping 10 days that October, correcting for too many leap years. (Please take into account those 10 days when attempting to calculate the Biblical apocalypse or any other prophesied event such as the return of the Christ.)
• December: 31 days. Julian (Roman) year's tenth month (decem, Latin for 10).

So why is February the only month with 28 days? Well technically they all have 28 days but February seems to be the victim of Roman calendar tinkering. Before adopting an Egyptian style calendar based upon the solar year the pagan origins of the Roman calendar were based upon the lunar cycle. Recall that February was at the end of the Roman year which started in March so February fell victim of all shorts of adjustments to attempt to synchronize the calendar to the actual solar year. It had as many as 35 days depending on the needs to keep in step with the solar year. When Julius Caesar was assassinated in 44 B.C. (B.C.E for our politically correct numbskull friends) they renamed the 5th month in his honor and gave it 31 days. Later they renamed the 6th month for Augusus Caesar and gave it 31 days. They purloined these days from the caboose of the train, February.

FAIR PLAY FOR FEBRUARY!

It's time to address historical wrongs. Let's give poor February it's just due. I propose that all months have 30 days except February which is to have 35 days (36 on leap year). Think of these 5 days as reparations to February. Our only other alternative is to slow down the earth's orbit around the Sun by 5 days. Try to get THAT through Congress.

"Thirty days hath September and all the rest I remember except February which now has 35!"

The Reward

A young boy taken to Church by his loving parents, sits in the pews and listens to the minister preach the Gospel of the Lord Jesus. And the minister embellishes the story a bit by describing a scene of a beautiful garden where the Lord will walk with the true believers for eternity. "Imagine walking hand in hand with our Lord Jesus in paradise forever" intoned the minister. As the young boy grew into manhood he never forgot the image of walking hand in hand with the Lord in that incredibly beautiful garden. He lived his life, took a wife and fathered a son which he later took to the same church so his son could hear the "good news". Being a father he liked to imagine his son also walking hand in hand with the Lord Jesus in the paradise garden. In the autumn of his life the man, now a grandfather, began to unceasingly ponder the image of walking in the garden with Jesus. The image became so real that he came to accept it as his fate and as his reward. Years later as he lay dying in his hospital bed all he could think about was walking in the garden with his beloved Lord. And then he died.

"Lord."
"Yes my child?"
"We have been walking in this wonderful garden for 10,000 years."
"Yes my child, 10,000 wonderful years."
"I need to know something Lord."
"What is it my child?"
"Is this all there is?"
"No my child, there is much, much more. This is all you wanted."

Global Warming - Part 1

My friend Julie asked me what I thought about Global Warming. Her new boyfriend is very conservative and thinks the global warming debate is a scare by the Obama administration to shut down business. (Yes I realize the global warming controversy is much older than the Obama administration.) My Friend Mark, an attorney in the greater Los Angeles metroplex told me once that "the time for debate is over, we must take drastic action to avoid the coming ecological catastrophe." Most of us fall somewhere in between these 2 extremes.

My answer to Julie was basically in 2 parts. First I like to ask if global warming is man caused, what is causing global warming on Mars? Mark's answer to this was "oh, you found a red herring" and dismissed my question. Julie seemed to accept that the cause of global warming is not so clear. Second I told Julie whereas I am not a stupid person I just can't seem to get my head wrapped around the problem. There are too many variables. The famous Hockey Stick chart of warming trends doesn't seem to stand up to rigorous statistical analysis. The claim that Ice is thinner today than any other time in history lacks credibility because of how the data is collected. It is easy to take temperatures readings globally today using satellites but satellites have only be around since the late 1960's. Does ice core samples give an accurate temperature reading for a specific date? I don't know. Do you? Yet ice thickness and global temperatures are based on these measurements.

Global Warming studies use a lot of disciplines. Statistics, Meteorology, Climatology, Geography, Computer Science, Physics, Economics, Astronomy, not to mention Political Science and Psychology. I have training in Economics and Computer Science and understand enough of the Global Warming arguments in those areas to form an opinion. As to the other areas, I'm pretty clueless. Are you up to speed on these disciplines?

My friend Robert said the other day "it's a 50-50 proposition. Either there is a coming global catastrophe or there isn't so we better act as if there is and start trying to reverse it. This is kind of a variation on Pascal's argument for the existence of God. It is specious and doesn't prove anything but rather is designed to appeal to the emotions. (Both Robert's 50-50 argument and Pascal's wager.) But that seems to be the central theme of the Global Warming debate. Get as many people on you side as you can and build your power base. And once you have the power you can make changes to US policy to mitigate the effects of dumping so much "green house gases" into the atmosphere. Physicist and Meteorologist Craig Bohren, distinguished professor emeritus at the Pennsylvania State University, said "Whatever the US and Europe do to mitigate consumption is likely to be negated by increased consumption in countries such as China, India, and Brazil." http://www.usatodayom/tech/colum.cnist/aprilholladay/2006-08-07-global-warming-truth_x.htm

My point is this. I don't get it. And I don't see a clear path to determining the truth about Global Warming. But I can see a huge potential for abuse here. Hidden agendas being served, political power being fueled, and the usual blatant manipulation of the public.